This past week I was presenting my Core Democratic Values program at a school in Detroit. There is a part in the program where I pick twelve students to help me to demonstrate the first three articles of the Constitution. The last young lady I asked up was sitting in the middle of the second row. She was so excited that I picked her she jumped up from her seat. As she was trying to walk over to the center aisle three boys grabbed her pant leg and tried to trip her. She caught her balance and gave all three of those boys a stare that would scare a bear. The boys giggling faces quickly turned to fear. They bowed their heads down as if they were being scold by the principal.
The best thing we can teach our students and children is that we don't have to say anything to get the point across. In a great book entitled Bully-Proofing Your School the authors talk about "getting the meaning without words" (P.67) It's all about body langeuge. If we are giving the bully firm eye contact we can effectively send out a non-verbal message that clearly means "KNOCK IT OFF!".
"Most powerful is he who has himself in his own power" Seneca
Copyright Richard Paul 2007
Send in your comments to richard@richardpaul.com and we will post them to the blog.
Tuesday, March 27, 2007
Saturday, March 10, 2007
DAD THAT FOUR YEAR OLD BOY SWEARS
At dinner tonight my daughter was talking about our neighbor's four year old and how he is always swearing. She also added that the parents swear a lot too. Over the past few months the boy's mom has started to put soap in his mouth when ever he says a bad word. I've been thinking of her chasing the boy throughout the house screaming to him, " get the XXX over here."
I was speaking at an event and we were sharing how children learn from adults. As teachers, parents or care takers we must always watch are own actions what we do and what we say.
We could be bullying a child or even another adult in front of our children and not even know it.
If we want to teach our children to be nice we must take responsibility for our own actions.
If we think we did or said something wrong we should admit it to our children. They will not only learn that even adults make mistakes they will also learn right from wrong.
Many times I have apologized to my children when I have demonstrated poor behavior and I believe it has not only strengthened our relationship but also taught them how to be good, respectable citizens.
Copyright Richard Paul 2007
If you have a comment or suggestion email richard@richardpaul.com
I was speaking at an event and we were sharing how children learn from adults. As teachers, parents or care takers we must always watch are own actions what we do and what we say.
We could be bullying a child or even another adult in front of our children and not even know it.
If we want to teach our children to be nice we must take responsibility for our own actions.
If we think we did or said something wrong we should admit it to our children. They will not only learn that even adults make mistakes they will also learn right from wrong.
Many times I have apologized to my children when I have demonstrated poor behavior and I believe it has not only strengthened our relationship but also taught them how to be good, respectable citizens.
Copyright Richard Paul 2007
If you have a comment or suggestion email richard@richardpaul.com
Stop It, Stop It Now!
At my school programs I offer advice to students that are being bullied. I remind them that if they use their fists or use aggressive behavior in any way they will more than likely end up in the Principal's office. I tell them the best way to handle a bully is to look them in the eyes and tell them to STOP IT, STOP IT NOW! If you don't stop it I will tell someone. I explain that you must use eye contact, without it the bully will not take you seriously.
There was a young lady with curly hair, freckles and thick glasses. She was being teased everyday by a boy on the bus. One day she looked him in the eyes and screamed "Stop it, Stop it Now! The bus became quiet and the girl just looked him in the eyes. The bus driver shouted on her microphone, "It there a problem?" the girl continued to stair him in the eyes and said, "Is there a problem? " The boy put his head down shook it back and forth and mumbled "No."
They only way someone will help the victim is if she helps herself first. The best thing you can share with your students or your children is to keep their head up high and know that no one has the right to hurt them or make fun of them in anyway.
Copyright Richard Paul 2007
Have a comment or suggestion feel free to email me at richard@richardpaul.com
There was a young lady with curly hair, freckles and thick glasses. She was being teased everyday by a boy on the bus. One day she looked him in the eyes and screamed "Stop it, Stop it Now! The bus became quiet and the girl just looked him in the eyes. The bus driver shouted on her microphone, "It there a problem?" the girl continued to stair him in the eyes and said, "Is there a problem? " The boy put his head down shook it back and forth and mumbled "No."
They only way someone will help the victim is if she helps herself first. The best thing you can share with your students or your children is to keep their head up high and know that no one has the right to hurt them or make fun of them in anyway.
Copyright Richard Paul 2007
Have a comment or suggestion feel free to email me at richard@richardpaul.com
Monday, March 5, 2007
Conflict or Bullying
There is a difference between Conflict and Bullying. Traditionally when students are in conflict both involved in the spat are equally upset. In a bullying situation you have one student over powering another. Conflict is when one or both persons ego is hurt and it usually occurs onetime. Bullying is going below the belt so to speak, to insult, tease, threaten on a regular basis.
Students experience conflicts at school and at home as part of growing up. Studies have shown that through conflict we learn how to give and take and to improve on our social interaction and developmental skills. Bullying on the other hand can cause unneeded stress and in some cases depression issues.
As parents, teachers and caregivers we must observe the situation and know the difference between Conflict and Bullying in order to act appropriately to the needs of the students.
Copyright Richard Paul 2007
Feel free to comment and share stories by emailing us at richard@richardpaul.com
Students experience conflicts at school and at home as part of growing up. Studies have shown that through conflict we learn how to give and take and to improve on our social interaction and developmental skills. Bullying on the other hand can cause unneeded stress and in some cases depression issues.
As parents, teachers and caregivers we must observe the situation and know the difference between Conflict and Bullying in order to act appropriately to the needs of the students.
Copyright Richard Paul 2007
Feel free to comment and share stories by emailing us at richard@richardpaul.com
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